Calling the QB Races; Circling the Giants Drain; the Splendiferous Caleb Williams
Walkthrough predicts the winners of the Raiders/Broncos/other quarterback competitions while debating the merits of preseason “GIF-scouting.”
Imagine being a New York Giants fan and realizing in the middle of August that your entire 2024 season needs to be stuffed down the garbage disposal like a moldy cucumber.
Some of you are Giants fans and therefore do not have to imagine. The rest of us offer our condolences, but Too Deep Zone reserves the right to keep rubbernecking like a sicko at this multi-vehicle pileup of a football team.
Daniel Jones saw his first action since his November ACL tear in Saturday’s 28-10 preseason loss to the Texans. Jones’ first pass was nearly intercepted by Derek Stingley. On the Giants second series, Jones faced pressure in the end zone, pump-faked as defender Derek Barnett pawed at him and panic-farted a dying pigeon that Jalen Pitre intercepted for an easy pick-6. On his third series, Jones tried to thread a touch pass up the right sideline to a blanketed Jalin Hyatt; Stingley stepped in front of Hyatt for Jones’ second interception.
The Texans benched their starters after that, but Brian Daboll ordered Jones and the first-string Giants offense to stay on the field until there were no more lima beans on their plate. Jones finally delivered a 44-yard strike to Darius Slayton against the Texans backups. It would have been an encouraging moment if Jones and Slayton were rookies, but they are veterans occupying over $55-million in combined 2024 cap space. They should have been chatting with the sideline reporter for the Giants Television Network over Gatorade by that point of the game.
Giants fans may be tempted to manufacture positives from Saturday’s loss. Malik Nabers, for example, made a fine leaping catch before halftime, just days after a practice-field injury scare. But the Brian Burns/Kayvon Thibodeaux pass rush could not get to C.J. Stroud, despite the absence of Texans tackle Laremy Tunsil. Devin Singletary looked like a plodder behind a rebuilt offensive line which appears to have risen from 32nd in the league all the way up to 23rd. The Giants starting offense committed motion and formation penalties. A Jones-Singletary handoff was blown up by a defender during the exchange. All of these were minor issues orbiting one celestial issue:
FRANCHISE-CALIBER NFL QUARTERBACKS DON’T THROW PICK-6’S FROM THEIR OWN END ZONE IN PRESEASON GAMES.
This is not an overreaction to one half of preseason football. It’s a confirmation of what we’ve witnessed for six preseasons. Jones remains, charitably, somewhere between the 25th- and 40th-best quarterback in the NFL. The team’s financial commitment to him remains a tragic exercise in wishful thinking. His salary is a thick wad of cholesterol in the team’s financial bloodstream. And there is no viable alternative on the roster. (Tommy Cacciatore led an exhausting punt-and-fumble drill in the second half.) Nothing Nabers or Burns might do will change the fact that the Giants are in for another year of pretending that Jones is anything but a sunk cost.